Well, I just came out of the bathroom... where I was trying to pull myself together... ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! I am pissed!!!!!!

Ok, so, I got really excited the other day when I found out that one of my friends from high school would be stage managing Threepenny Opera. I emailed her to inquire about what rehearsals may be like and see how she was doing. She told me that she didn't know about rehearsals yet but that she was supposed to meet with the director that night to discuss them.
Well, I get an email from her today telling me that the director does not have me on the cast list... therefore I am not in the show. She apologized and said that she didn't know where the miscommunication orginated and that she was so sorry. I don't blame her, it's totally not her fault, she just signed up to work on this show recently. Well, I told her that the artistic director called me to tell me that I hadn't gotten the supporting role, but that the director wanted to offer me a spot in the chorus. I accepted gladly, and she said I'd be getting a call sometime next (or this) year about the rehearsal schedule. I remember this! I'm not crazy!!!
So, now I'm pissed because she must've told the director that I turned it down or something.
What makes it worse is that this is the second "miscommunication" that has occurred to me since I auditioned. The first being when they forgot to tell me the callbacks had been rescheduled and I showed up there like an idiot. How can they do this to me twice? Do I even fucking exist!?
AHHHH! I really hate them right now, I really do.
And say my friend emails me back and says that the director has allowed me to be in the cast anyway... I think I'd say "no" because I don't want to be let in out of pity, it wouldn't feel right.

But what majorly urks me is that if someone had informed me of not being in the cast I couldn've been auditioning for things this whole time! But NO! Now my Spring is fucked because everyone is done with auditions and I have no fucking show now! FUCK!
What makes is worse is the fucking embarrassement of going back to everyone now and saying, "remember that show I told you I was gonna be in? Well, I'm not in it now due to miscommunication." I mean, how the fuck is that gonna feel. I have to tell my fucking parents!!! God, no! This is so embarrassing and so wrong. How could they do this to me twice! How could they fuck up with me twice! I don't even know if I ever want to audition for them ever again.

Well, I have to try and work now... hopefully I won't end up in the bathroom again, crying.